New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
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