McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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