i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Randomize
