As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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