at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Randomize
