No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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