that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
You can't just leave with hair like that
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
