I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
