With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
