i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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