just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
