So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize