she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Randomize
