Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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