I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
