let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
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