Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Randomize
