I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Randomize
