The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Shame - the story of my life.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
