But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
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