Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
