I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Everything about him screamed your future.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
