You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize