She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Randomize
