I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
