are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
high people should be assigned attendants
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
