What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
