Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Randomize
