I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Randomize
