Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize