I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
