if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
I think i got beer on your cat.
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