The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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