Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
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