idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Randomize
