Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
