I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize
