Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
You took a bar mat shot.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
