wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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