do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
