I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Randomize
