It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
i drank out of a bidet.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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