I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Randomize
