Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
Randomize
