Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
