she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
