dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Randomize