I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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