So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
only if we run a train.
done.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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