what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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